Chapter 5 & Proxemics

While reading Chapter 5 the discussion of proxemics was very interesting to me. Trenholm defines proxemics as the study of how we use space and what space means to us. There are many different forms of space, but personal space is very important. Personal space, intimate space these lines should not be crossed in a public territory of any kind. When you are in a public territory where there are many people bumping into someone or being very close to another person on a bus or in a crowd can cause personal space to be invaded. Trenholm discusses body territory as a personal area, personal space. There are areas on our body which we let people touch, such as hand shakes, but we do not always give out hugs.

Cultural differences provide a variety of proxemics and what is acceptable. Within the Japanese community bowing is known as a cultural greeting not shaking hands. The lower the bow is the more respect one shows. Personal space is normally not invaded, distance is key and hugging and kisses are widely used. Within the Hispanic community, kisses and hugs are a must when you first arrive and when you leave. If you do not say hello to an elder than you are showing much disrespect. A hug and a kiss on the cheek is how to greet an aunt or an uncle.

Each individual has their own personal rules of proxemics and different cultures have their own regulations and rules of proxemics.

Men & Women

Men and women do use language differently. Trenholm states, men bond through physical activites while women bond through talk on page 91. Men find a bond while playing sports with other men and finding common ground through testing their guy's limits and reliability. During sports you have to depend on others and work together, if guys cant even play a basketball game together it is easy to say there wont be a bond to find either. Women love to talk, and love to express themselves verbally. When i go to a coffee shop, i see a ratio of a many, many more women than men sitting and talking.

A personal example would have to be a comparison with my older brother and I. I am very chatty, outspoken and am always asking questions. My brother keeps very much to himself, if no one talks to him then he wont talk to anyone. He is very introverted while i am extroverted. He does not easily disclose personal information, you got to ask a million questions to get a little bit of information. He loves his own time, he doesnt need to be around a lot of people to feel happy, he likes his alone time. I on the other hand, if i am alone for too long I question why? I like my alone time too, but I love interacting with others more.

Here are some hints of his language to others that he does'nt know that i have noticed. Whenever he is fighting with his girlfriend he plays video games for hours and house at a time. He likes to distract himself in his virtual world. I hear him up late and i know he is going through something with her. I on the other hand need to talk about it if i am fighting with a significant other. I cant just play a game to feel better, i need to vent. Men and women communicate similar needs just in different behaviors.

We are Judgmental, why?

The human's ability to judge and create their own perception of others is never going to end. Each individual is going to have their own judgments of someone or something. For example, for a job interview one would dress very nice, do their hair, put on make up because they know they will be getting judged and we accept this form of judgment. Judging others and being right or being wrong is not going anywhere in society today. Testing such judgments and experimenting with one's own perception on anything can make judging a new kind of experience.

If each person has their own perception and develops their own judgment on a certain culture but have no experience can give them false information. When individuals create negative or possitive judgmental facts of something or someone when they have zero first had exposure is where the problem comes in. Perhaps people feel the need to judge because they need to create their own answers to something they do not understand. These people should find the desire within themselves to experience everything and then make an educated judgment at least.

The one concept in Chapter 10 which stood out to me was speech anxiety. The chapter indicates experiences with speaking too fast. or too slow, stammering, blockage, dry mouth, and rapid heartbeat. Reading this chapter I was relieved to learn speech anxiety is completely normal. As well as speech anxiety can improve over time with practice and more experience. The chapter suggests cognitive restructuring which is a form of taking those negative thoughts into positive, motivational thoughts. Physical relaxation is another element one could use to help the body relax; having the body relaxed can aid in mental relaxation. Systematic desensitization is also a process that may aid in speech anxiety. Systematic desensitization is to learn how to substitute deep relaxation for fear responses, finally those fear reactions can be managed with this specific process.

The concept of speech anxiety is an important concept for me because I do get nerves while speaking and it does have a negative effect on my delivery and the impression i leave with the audience. The most important thing i learned is that speech anxiety can be managed and with practice can be beat.

Social Constructionist Perspective

Cultural diversity is a major aspect in the elements of bad and good communication. Trenholm states, " we take those parts of it that our culture makes significant, process them in culturally recognized ways, connect them to other 'facts' and respond to them in ways our culture considers significant." I do not know if we never experience the world directly because of culture, however culture directly influences the way in which we communicate. The way in which we build words in the United States is because of immigration, because of inter-racial experiences and relationships between individuals of different cultures.
An example of a part of culture which is more valuable in one culture and not as valued in another culture is education. Within the Hispanic culture I have learned education is not valued in the same way as here in the American culture. My grandmother who did live in the United States, was not encouraged, or expected to go to school. Her mother told her she did not need to go to school because she was going to be cooking, and staying in the kitchen the rest of her life. My grandmother's job was expected to just be a homemaker and take care of the household. Although times of progressed, there are still cultures and religions which do not see the woman as an individual who should be educated or successful.
To continue with higher education has recently become a significant part of my families culture.

Best&worst speaker

The best speaker i have ever heard i believe is very close with Martin Luther King Jr. and Cesar Chavez. When i was in middle school i remember learning about Martin Luther King Jr, and I was memorized by his words. It was my first exposure to all the elements and forces related to the racism and prejudice during the time of the Civil Rights Movement. Being a minority in society to be a proactive member of society and spreading cultural competence around the world such as Martin Luther King Jr had done is a major time in history. It is a major time in history because without acknowledging discrimination within the United States change would not even be an option.
Cesar Chavez was also a great leader and spoke with such passion during the Farm Workers Movement. Chavez was the one who inspired thousands and thousands of Mexican, and Mexican Americans to fight for better, equal rights within the Mexican Community. Having family members endure such horrible working environments and discrimination creates a sense gratitude to the passionate speaker.
Both Cesar Chavez and Martin Luther King Jr. were very infuencial speakers and leaders to me and to the world. Their determination, passion, and faith within the human race was very powerful to all.
The worst speaker I have ever heard would have to be Paris Hilton. Whenever she speaks I feel as if i have lost a few brain cells. I would not consider her a leader, but she does speak to the world, and is influential because of the media. She is in the media and the news more than Martin Luther King Jr. and Cesar Chavez combined. She is the worst speaker because she lacks the integrity, passion, and selflessness great leaders have. I believe it is very sad her words are followed more frequently than the greatest speakers throughout history.

about chubbyhub

Hello classmates.

I am quite uncomfortable, i am not sure what to write. I will be a fourth year at San Jose State this coming fall and i cannot wait to graduate Spring 2011, hopefully! I am majoring in communications and minoring in sociology. I really love interpersonal aspects of communications as well as the cultural competence within the communication field. I love to laugh. I am not sure what else to say! ohhh goodness okay well i am no sure about this blogging thing. haha but i hope this class goes well and i know i will definitely learn a lot.

until the next awkward post from chubbyhub...ohhh goodness!

blogging

so how do i do this exactly? what does blogging mean?